What's a Drink meant for Men and Women?

Let's click on the pictures below to see what's a drink meant for men and women =P

RM100

A little boy wanted RM100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened.

Then he decided to write GOD a letter requesting the RM100.

When the Pos Malaysia received the letter addressed to GOD,
they decided to send it to the Prime Minister - Pak Lah.

The PM was so impressed, touched, and amused that he
instructed his secretary to send the little boy a RM5.00
bill. Pak Lah thought this would appear to be a lot of
money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the RM5.00 and sat down
to write a thank you note to GOD, which read: 'Dear
GOD, Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I
noticed that for some reason you had to send it through
PutraJaya and, as usual, those bastards took away
RM95.00.'

你猜我幾歲?

某美女,決定下重金,讓自己瘦身.
花十幾萬元以後,她覺得非常滿意!
回家路上,在報攤,買了份報紙,找錢的時候,她問老闆："不好意思,你猜我幾歲？"
老闆說:"32"
她好高興:"47啦!"
接著,她去賣當勞問櫃檯的小姐同樣的問題..
小姐說:"我猜29!"
她好高興:"不是,47啦!"

興高采烈,她去街角的統一超商,買包口香糖.忍不住,又問那裡的櫃檯小姐.
小姐說:"嗯,我猜30"
她好得意:"47,謝謝!"
等公車的時候,她又問旁邊的老頭.
老頭說：我七十八歲了,眼睛不好,看不出來.不過,年輕的時候,有種方法,可以確定,如果妳讓我把手伸進妳的乳罩,我絕對可以知道妳的年紀！
半晌無聲,空曠的大街上,她終於忍不住好奇："好吧!你試試看."
老頭把手,伸入她的襯衫,又伸進她的乳罩,
開始緩慢而仔細地摸索.
幾分鐘以後,她說:"好了!你猜我幾歲?"
他又捏了最後一下,把手拿出來.　
說："女士,妳47歲.."
美女大吃一驚,訝異的問:"好厲害!你怎麼知道?"
"保證不生氣?"
"不生氣!"
"在麥當勞,我排妳後面."

Malaysian vs Singaporean

A Singaporean was on holiday in Malaysia. He was all having his coffee, croissants, bread, butter and jam at the hotel's coffee house. A Malaysian man who was chewing gum, sat down next to him and hence started a casual conversation.

Malaysian: You Singaporeans eat the whole bread?
Singaporean: Of course.
Malaysian: We don't. In Malaysia, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants & sell them across to Singapore.

The Malaysian then had a smirk on his face while the Singaporean listened in silence.

Malaysian: Do you eat the jam with the bread?
Singaporean: Of course.
Malaysian *chuckling*: We don't. In Malaysia, we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds and other left-overs in a container recycle them, transform them into jam, before we sell it across to Singapore.

This time, the Singaporean retorted: Do you have sex in Malaysia?
Malaysian: Why, of course we do!
Singaporean: Do you wear protection?
Malaysian: Of course! We wear condoms.
Malaysian: Stupid question! Of course we throw them away.
Singaporean: We don't. In Singapore, the government secretly puts them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them across to Malaysia.. That's the real reason why we banned chewing gum in Singapore.

Plan for Future

It's year 2008, for the very begining of the year, teacher asks children, "what do u wish to do in future?"

Ahmed: I want to be a pilot.
James: I want to be a doctor.
Deepa: I want to be a good mother.
Asif: I want to help Deepa.
Teacher: ...

Guarantee in China

A man went on a business to China and wanted to buy some gifts for his kids. He went to a shop and found a nice looking CD player. Wary of buying inferior goods, he asked the shopkeeper, 'What would happen if this does not work?'

The shopkeeper quietly points to the only sign in English that reads, 'GUARANTEE NO SPOILT'.

Feeling assured, he paid for the CD player and returns to his hotel. He tried to use the CD player after returning to the hotel but it would not even switch on.

He quickly return to the shop and asked for a refund or an exchange for another unit. When the shopkeeper refuse to give either, the man points to the sign assuring him of a guarantee.

The shopkeeper then said, 'Brother, you are in China. We read from the right to the left.'

The Truth behind..

Let's see what we got in Ah Beng's new house!

Cool! He got himself and his new house a plasma TV!

We were shocked.

We were shocked again when we incidentally entered one of the rooms of his new house.That's the truth behind the plasma TV of our dearest Ah Beng!

A little Old Lady

A little old lady went into the Bank of Canada one day carrying a bag of money. She insisted that she must speak with the president of the bank to open a savings account because, "It's a lot of money!"

After much hemming and hawing, the bank staff finally ushered her into the president's office because customer is always right! The bank president then asked her how much she would like to deposit. She replied, "$165,000!" and dumped the cash out of her bag onto his desk.

The president was of course curious as to how she came by all this cash, so he asked her, "Ma'am, I'm surprised you're carrying so much cash around. Where did you get this money?" The old lady replied, "I make bets." The president then asked, "Bets? What kind of bets?" The old woman said, "Well, for example, I'll bet you $25,000 that your balls are square."

"Ha!" laughed the president, "That's a stupid bet. You can never win that kind of bet!" The old lady challenged, "So, would you like to take my bet?" "Sure," said the president, I'll bet $25,000 that my balls are not square!" The little old lady then said, "Okay, but since there is a lot of money involved, may I bring my lawyer with me tomorrow at 10:00a.m. as a witness?" "Sure!" replied the confident president.

That night, the president got very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of a mirror checking his balls, turning from side to side, again and again. He thoroughly checked them out until he was sure there was absolutely no way his balls were square and that he would win the bet.

The next morning, at precisely 10:00 am, the little old lady appeared with her lawyer at the president's office. She introduced the lawyer to the president and repeated the bet: "$25,000 says the president's balls are square!" The president agreed with the bet again and the old lady asked him to drop his pants so they could all see.

The president did. The little old lady peered closely at his balls and then asked if she could feel them. "Well, Okay," said the president, "$25,000 is a lot of money, so I guess you should be absolutely sure."

Just then, he noticed that the lawyer was quietly banging his head against the wall. The President asked the old lady, "What the hell's the matter with your lawyer?" She replied, "Nothing, except I bet him $100,000 that at 10:00a.m. today, I'd have the Bank of Canada's president's balls in my hand."

Two Ghosts' Conversation

Two ghosts met and both chat about how they died.

1st ghost: How u died?

2nd ghost: I died of cold.

1st ghost: How does it feel when you're dying in cold?

2nd ghost: Actually, I was imprisoned in the refrigerator. Initially, I was shivering, then my whole body started to freeze, later I felt the whole world was dark and I died. Fortunately, I died with not much sufferings.

1st ghost: You're so pityful....

2nd ghost: How about you? How did u die?

1st ghost: I died from heart attack

2nd ghost: I see, why did u have a heart attack?

1st ghost: Actually, I found out that my wife is having an affair with another man. One day, when I came back from work, saw a pair of man shoes outside my house. Then, I realized that the guy was in my house with my wife. When I rushed into the bedroom, my wife was alone. I must find where that bastard is hiding. So I searched the toilet, I ran downstairs, looked in the storeroom, but the bastard was not there. So, I ran upstairs and searched the wardrobe, but I found nothing. Because I was too tired of all that running, I got a heart attack and died.

2nd ghost: Why didn't you look for the bastard in the fridge? If you did, both of us were alive now!!

Who's cheating?

A man and a woman were asleep like two babies.
Suddenly, at 2am, a resounding noise came from outside.
The woman, bewildered, jumps up from the bed and yells at the man: “Shit! That's must be my husband!”

So, the guy quickly gets out of bed, scared and naked. He jumps out the window like a crazy man, smashes himself on the ground, runs through a thorn bush, then he stands up and starts to run fast to his car.

Just a few minutes later he returns and tells the woman: “I’m your husband, you slut!!!”

The woman answers: “Oh, yeah?!! Why were you running?!! You ass hole!”

Transformer from Malaysia

Introduce to you all, the transformers from Proton & Perodua, cheers!

Proton - Perdana Autobot

Proton - Waja Autobot












Proton - Savvy Autobot












Proton - Juara Autobot

Perodua - Myvi Autobot












Perodua - Kancil Autobot

Joke of the Day - Soup

Joke again, why I keep posting jokes here, because our life is too short to be considered too seriously, so let's have some laughter medicine at my site!

In a restaurant, a man ordered soup but, as soon as it arrived, he had to go to the bathroom. To make sure that nobody touched his soup while he is away, he wrote on a napkin: "I SPIT IN THE SOUP". When he returned, he found another message on napkin: "ME, TOO".

Dead dog of Susie

Susie's mom and dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog had recently died.

"You know?" Mom said.
"It's not your fault that the dog died. He's probably up in heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."

Susie, still crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"

Night classes of Ah Beng

Ah Beng went to take night courses with the reasoning in future can get promotion or better job.

During work, Ah Beng likes to show off to Ah Seng about his knowledge.
Ah Beng: Ah Seng ah.. I've been taking night courses for 3 months already, next week is the exam.
Ah Seng: Oh.. Good luck ah..

Then Ah Beng started show off..
Ah Beng: Ok, I test you, who is Graham Bell?
Ah Seng: Don't know..
Ah Beng: He is the inventor of phone la.. in 1876.. See.. If youtake night courses, you would know this!
AhSeng: ..... *speechless*

The next day, Ah Beng shows off again..
Ah Beng: Ah Seng ah.. let me ask you,who is Jean Jacques Rousseau?
Ah Seng: Wash your toilet one ah?
Ah Beng: No! He's the authorof "Confessions", nah nah nah.. toldyou already, if youtake night courses, you would know this!
AhSeng: .....*speechless + frustrated*

The next day, once again...
Ah Beng: Do you know who is AlexanderDumas?
Ah Seng: Your gay partner?
Ah Beng: Choiii!!! If you don't know don't simply answer la. He's the author of "The 3 Musketeers", if you take night courses, you would know this too!
AhSeng: .....*speechless+ frustrated + irritated*

This time Ah Seng cannot tahan (stand) anymore and ask Ah Beng...
Ah Seng: Eh.. Do you know who is Ah Kaw?
Ah Beng: Errrr.. No!
Ah Seng: He's the guy sleeping with your wife!! If you stop night courses, you would know this!!
Ah Beng: .....*fainted*

A Joke about Malaysian

There once was a very good old barber in New York.



One day a florist goes to him for a haircut. After the cut, he goes to pay the barber and the barber replies: "I am sorry. I cannot accept money from you. I am doing community service." The Florist is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, there is a thank you card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.



A policeman goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the barber after the cut. But the barber replies: "I am sorry. I cannot accept money from you. I am doing community service." The cop is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning the barber goes to open his shop; there is a thank you card and
a dozen donuts waiting at his door.

A Malaysian software engineer goes for a haircut and he also does to pay the barber after the cut. But the barber replies: "I am sorry. I cannot accept money from you. I am doing community service." The Malaysian software engineer is happy and leaves. The next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, guess that he finds there... Can you guess?

Come on, think like a Malaysian......
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Have you got the answer?
A dozen Malaysian are waiting for a free haircut!
That's Malaysian lol and we are Malaysian!

Broken English IQ of Ah Beng

Ah Beng: English words got 26 alphabet. ET go away. Left 21 alphabet only.
Why why why?
..*Silent and No answer*..
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Ah Beng: So easy la. ET go away with UFO ma. Wahahahahaha...



Teacher: You really "Ah Beng" la.
Ah Beng: (-_-#)""